As California is locked down to prevent the spread of COVID-19, millions of people are beginning to go into quarantine across the country, whether mandated or voluntarily. With work, schools, gyms, restaurants, & bars closed, people’s daily routines have been disrupted, and increased social isolation is a daunting reality with no end in sight. China, the first country to shut down, is just in the process of opening back up, and as restrictions were lifted earlier this month, the country’s divorce rate has spiked. It would appear that married couples being bound to each other at home for a month did not strengthen their bond together but allowed the underlying conflict to get the better of them. A further review has psychoanalysts predicting a similar rise in the divorce rate in the United States. As experienced divorce lawyers in Tempe and Phoenix, Arizona, The Weingart Family Law Firm has seen our fair share of marital strife; here are three tips to help you survive quarantine with your spouse.
Communicate
There are many uncertainties during this time: people get sick, worry about family, and do not know if they will have a job to return to after the quarantine is lifted. From anger to fear, this quarantine is likely to stir up many emotions. One moment, your partner could be laughing, and the next, crying. Knowing what to expect in these uncharted territories is impossible, but understanding these emotional swings is normal. Communicating how you feel during this time is crucial; otherwise, emotions are left to interpretation and assumption. Help your spouse along this journey by navigating them to the underlying issues. Likewise, use this time to listen to your spouse if they are trying to communicate. Try not to minimize their feelings but acknowledge them. Sometimes, listening can be more comforting than saying anything at all.
Know When NOT To Communicate
Knowing when NOT to communicate with your spouse is as important as communication. Boundaries are essential in any relationship. When confined to close quarters, they are even more critical. Having your own room or area of the house to escape for some “me” time during your isolation is very important. For some, this may be easier than others, depending on the size of your home, but it can be as simple as having 30 minutes to watch your favorite show while your significant other works in the kitchen or going for a walk. We all need our alone time, even in self-isolation. Designate specific areas & times for each of you to have your space. Absence makes the heart grow fonder.
Spend Quality Time Together
One of the most significant issues that can develop in a long-term relationship is time. Well, now you have it….., but is it the quantity of time that matters? Unfortunately, not all the time spent together is equal. It’s not uncommon for two people to physically be together while one feels neglected. Please don’t fall for the common trap during this time; use it to have fun! Plan at least one activity that you will do together every day. This could mean making a date night. This could mean working on a project together. It’s important to designate time to do things that bring you together.
What’s most important is staying positive during this difficult time. This could be the opportunity you’ve been waiting for to reignite that lost spark. For others, it could be that eye-opening moment where they aren’t the same people as when they married. Either way, don’t allow unresolved conflict and hysteria to take over during this time. If you are in the latter predicament, The Weingart Family Law Firm is here to help you and your spouse find an amicable solution. Our Tempe and Phoenix divorce attorney is offering FREE 30-minute consultations to answer any questions you may have during this time. Adam Weingart is one of Arizona’s Top Family Law Attorney’s and is available for phone consultations.